Posts tagged coaching
How To Deal With the Dreaded "I Can't Afford It" Response

I'm so stoked to hand the blog over today to Halley Gray, one of the most supportive and helpful entrepreneurs and coaches I've ever met. She answers the most hair-pulling-out quandary we get - what to do when potential clients give you the dreaded "I can't afford it right now" response!


You want to book yourself out but holy crap, people keep trying to small you down.

It creates a shit-storm of doubt that swirls thru you every time a prospective client says, ‘that’s out of my price range’.


There’s no reason to start doubting your pricing. If your sales page is doing its job then that’s not the problem.

If you’ve put out amazing content that breaks down barriers around buying your service - then content is not your problem.

Do you talk to other people online and form real relationships? Then it’s not your visibility.


This is your problem:

You don’t have a marketing funnel in place.


The lower budget peeps want you and all your loving attention.

They just don’t want to buy you dinner first.

Instead of giving your 100% focus for beans (not sustainable nor good for you).


Create a workshop.

Create an ebook.

Create an e-course.

Create a podcast.

Create a Q&A.

Find a way to give the people what they want and maintain your sanity.

No one wants to be the ‘cheap’ client. (I’ve been one. It sucks.)

And the people who have the courage to say ‘that’s too high for me (right now)’ are the ones you want to reward.

This is how you gain momentum and start getting booked out.

Go and make clever solutions!


Halley Gray is the marketing strategist over at Evolve & Succeed. She focuses on getting creative freelancers booked out in advance (plus booming in business). She does this by using a specific combination of science experiments, content strategies and sales techniques. Read more about how getting booked out makes your life more fun.  

Stop Being a Pansy (In 5 Totally Spiritually-Approved Steps)

Stop Being a Pansy

In 5 Totally Spiritually-Approved Steps

(Warning: this post contains language anyone over the age of 3 with access to a TV or internet will have heard.)

Admit it. You're a pansy.

It's okay, we all are.

You know what I'm a pansy about?

The weather.

People ask me all the time why I live in Los Angeles instead of my  native New York. It's not because I like NYC less - in fact I feel more like myself at home. But I stay hiding out west because I'm absolutely terrified of anything below 50 degrees.

I haven't seen my dad in almost a year and a half, and it's going to be even longer because I refuse to plan a trip until the Big Thaw.

It doesn't stop there. I'm a wuss with even bigger things. Like submitting my writing.

I'm a storytelling coach and produced playwright. I've been editing professionally for over a decade. 

And I'm still terrified. I rely on jealousy and competition to light a big enough fire underneath my pansy ass, but barring that, I just sit, fret, and eat another piece of stone-ground chocolate.

Let's stop this. You go first.

How To Stop Being a Pansy

1) Accept your pansiness

The Course in Miracles a.k.a. Awesomest Book Ever tells us we're God's children and our natural state is blameless, forgiven, and fearless.

I'm not entirely convinced. It feels more like 80% of the time we're walking around like traumatized children, one playground fight away from road raging in our SUVs or crying inconsolably in a cocoon of blankets and unwashed hair. This number rises to 99% if you're a writer.

2) Realize that your pansiness is what's standing between you and your ultimate life.

Do you want to get into a better college than you ever dreamed you could?

Being a pansy won't get you there.

Do you want to have an awesome girlfriend?

Being a pansy won't help you call her.

Do you want to raise more funds this month than you have all year?

You know the drill. Don't be a pansy.

3) Determine how much pansiness is okay.

For me, being a weather wuss is totally fine. So is being terrified of $3000 a month studios and the 2 hours it takes to get back to Queens after midnight on the maybe-running F line.

But being a pansy in my career is not okay. Anytime I fear myself into procrastination, that's another day, week, month wasted on inaction.

Being a pansy with my writing is not okay. I came right out and told some fellow writers about my hesitation and one of them offered to apply her boot firmly to my rear. My very wussy rear. I immediately said yes.

4) Reveal your pansiness everywhere - help is all around

That brings us to the vital step. Once you've weeded out your acceptable pansiness from the holding-up-my-life pansiness, show your panties. Tell those you trust your fears and complacencies. If they're strong enough to lift you up out of your mire of negative self-talk and endless chocolate, let them.

5) Lastly, fuck the haters. 

This one is the hardest to deal with.

That's why Step 3 is to tell THOSE YOU TRUST. Not everyone needs to know you're  a pansy. (Unlike this blog post, which I should probably reconsider posting in public.)

You may get cited by the spiritual police. I was publicly singled out for using words like "pansy-ass" during a very un-pansy moment of sharing my fears and my truth.

A clear sign there's a pansiness epidemic is that people don't want to talk about it. Or maybe they don't like seeing a woman using words that are okay for a guy to say.

Being censured almost stopped me. My pansy side took over and I wanted to lay down in fetal position and rock for the next 3 days, screw the chocolate. "Somebody doesn't like me!" 

But I remembered the blog voice I admire the most: terribleminds. Chuck Wendig regularly uses fouler language that what's in this post and just last week lovingly accused his readers of suffering from a Twitter-transmitted brain parasite. He doesn't worry what people think and the internet flocks to him in droves, reposting his incisiveness by the thousand.

You'll hit bad nerves. You'll hit good ones. 

But if you're a pansy, you won't hit anything at all.